Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slow down in overall system performance — particularly in the
flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend
5.0. The new program also began making unexpected changes to the
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable
programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, and Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the
system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no
What can I do?
First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.
Please enter the command: " C:/ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME" and try to
download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But
remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to
default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the
background that will eventually seize control of all your system
Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are
unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and
performance. We recommend Food 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.
Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the
new program began running unexpected child processing that took up a lot
of space and valuable resources.
In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches
during system initialization, where it monitors all other system activity.
Applications such as PokerNight 10.3, Drunken Boys Night 2.5 and Monday
Night football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.
I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run
some of my other favorite applications. I am thinking about going back to
Girlfriend 7.0, but un-install does not work on this program.
Can you help me please?
This is a very common problem men complain about but is mostly due to a
primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0
with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a "UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT"
program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to
It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back
to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system would cause
Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained.
It is impossible to un-install, delete, or purge the program files from
the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because
Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend
8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system.
I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having
Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire
section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all
responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of
their cause. The best course of action will be to enter the command
C:\APOLOGIZE. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame
for all the GPFs.
Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance. Consider buying
additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend
Flowers 2.1, Jewelry 2.2, and Chocolates 5.0.
Do not, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3.
This is not a supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause
irreversible damage to the operating system.
Best of luck,